ROI

In finance, ROI means "Return on Investment". I can apply this term to my life right now. The twins will turn 3 on August 29, 2005. One day from today. Tomorrow to be exact. I am now seeing and feeling the full weight of my ROI, and I think I am getting a very, very good one. Babies are not my bag and I feel like I have invested the time and effort, during these last three years, in these babies and now I am really seeing the return. I guess, unlike most mothers, I have wished their babyhood away, waiting with eagerness to meet the young men they will become. I like kids, not babies. And so here we are, babyhood behind us and moving forward.

In 2002 we learned we were expecting twins. Much to our surprise, and honestly, not a very happy surprise at that. We did not plan to have any more children at that point in our lives. There was much crying and holding-head-in-hands kind of thing. But, they were coming and we had to deal with that and press on.

And so they came, August 29th, 2002. Jonas at 3:03pm and Tristan at 3:05pm. Perfect little boys, healthy in all ways, and I was too. The pregnancy had been a breeze and the labor and delivery was a cakewalk. No sweat. But I knew that was the easy part anyway, and the hard part was still to come. I told myself that if I made it to their 3rd birthday, everything after that would be okay. And it will be. All of our lives have changed, we have all learned a lot about ourselves, all because of them.

So this entry should be about the good stuff, not the bad stuff or the negative emotions. They are turning three! And they are fantastic little boys. They love all of us with that 3 yr old abandon, the stuff that makes your insides feel all warm. We yell at them and they cry and want us to hug them, they wake up happy every day, not groggily and slowly like grown-ups do, but all of a sudden, like a person who has a whole big day ahead of them and they must get going right now. They have brought so many good things to our lives, taught us to be more patient and to slow down. They have taught Hayden about being a big sister and about being the big kid that the little ones look up to. They have showed me that "just" staying home can indeed be okay. The days have come where I miss them so much when I am gone and we don't debate so much over who will stay home with the boys and who will run errands. Now running errands is becoming the bigger pain in the ass! They get so excited over the smallest things, the things we overlook. Bugs, trains - these they can hear in the distance and stop to point out that somewhere there is a train blowing its whistle, rain, birds, flowers, all of those things we pass by and never see. They insist on slowing down and looking. They have two different personalities, yet they are so much the same. They do everything together, one always following the other. It is truly amazing how twins work.

Happy Birthday Jonas and Tristan! You have been an absolute blessing to our family and I can't imagine a world without you.