Motorola Razr

I have this hip, sleek, cool and trendy cell phone. I loved it when I first got it. But then I dropped it, which I do a lot....and the glass on the front that covers the screen and the camera lens broke. Now I can't use the camera on it, which was one of the major reasons I got a new phone in the first place, so I would always have a camera with me. They tell me I have to send it in to Motorola to repair. How can I part with my cell phone for God knows how long?

My old phone was able to withstand being dropped, no problem. I am regretting buying this phone as I can't get a new one without paying full price (Cingular only gives you deals when you are renewing a contract). This phone is too delicate. If you are a rough cell phone user, I would stay the hell away from the Razr. Being hip and cool doesn't go along with being rough and clumsy apparently.

Reduced to tears

So, it has been almost 2 weeks since I bought my motorcycle and then fucked my leg up with it. This burn on my leg has been like a fucking proverbial albatross around the neck. It has been the first thing I thought of when I wake up and the last thing I think of when I fall asleep. It hurts. Like hell.

Monday morning I burst into tears as I cut up cheese for the preschool snack. My leg throbbed as I simply stood there performing this menial task. I was so frustrated with this injury that constantly hurts that I just cried. That and I had worked the night before so I was somewhat sleep deprived. Then, later on the same day, I was trying to change the dressing and discovered it was stuck to the burn. I got in the shower hoping the water would losen the bandage and it did a little, but I had to pull it off anyway. I sat on the edge of my bathtub just sobbing hysterically, knowing I had to pull this thing off and knowing full well it was going to make me sick because it would hurt so bad. But I did it, I pulled it off. And then I cried and cried.

There is good news though. My doctor called in another prescription for pain and that is helping. Today when I woke up and put my foot on the floor, the pain wasn't so blinding and I was able to walk without cursing. The burn seems to be healing and a lot of the dead skin is gone now. I think I am getting close to a full recovery. Oh, and most importantly, I figured out how to fix my bike. The part they got for me is too big but that can be easily corrected. I was just pleased that I was able to change the part myself!

I hope that by next week I will have more thoughts on my mind other than this sonofawhore burn on my leg.

Keep the shiny side up

Dear Suzuki Motor Corporation,

Perhaps you should consider requiring that all customers participate in an IQ test prior to purchasing your motorcycles. It is quite possible that I am far too stupid to own a brand new Suzuki SV650 in red.

I bought one of your fine motorcycles on 3/15/06 and on 3/16/06, I parked it in my driveway, cut off the engine and dismounted....without putting the side-stand down. I had been out for a ride on this beautiful bike and was completely high on adrenaline. In my V-Twin induced stupor, I went stupid and just dropped the bike right on the ground. I broke off the shift lever and part of the clutch lever, so I can't even ride my bike now. The wonderful people at Canton Suzuki told me the parts should arrive on Tuesday, 3/21/06, but that doesn't really matter since I now have a second degree burn on my right leg because I laid it on the engine.

Let me just say that your motorcycle does a fine job of deep frying human flesh and I am so thrilled that I bought this particular bike because it has a display that told me that my flesh was fried at a temperature of 194 degrees. I mean, if you are going to incapacitate yourself by cooking your leg, it is useful to know at what temperature.

This burn is quite possibly the most painful injury I have had to date. Twice a day I have to remove the dressing and clean it with soap and water. Oh this is a special part of my day, wiping the wound with a cloth and soap and water. Then I have to cover it again with ointment and wrap it back up with $25 worth of bandages. Standing up and walking is akin to being drawn and quartered. This is one hell of a price to pay for being totally fucking stupid.

Lessons learned: Side-stand down THEN dismount. Wear full boots.

Here is what my boo boo looks like today:

Ta Da!

I bought this bike last week. I have owned it since Wednesday, 3/15/2006. Last year, when I began thinking about getting a bike, I started doing my research. This bike has won "Best bang for the buck" several years in a row. It is Suzuki's contribution to the Sport/Standard niche of motorcycles. A sportier version of the standard, commuter bike. I love it. Everyone who said all of the great things about this bike were right. Granted I have not owned it very long and managed to break it the first day I owned it, still.....the grin-factor is huge on this thing.

Well, what do they know?

I have been amazed lately to discover, that my twin sons are apparently learning to read somehow. They are learning the fundamental structure of the English language and how letters are formed and how words are formed from those letters. Wow. How did that happen?

As we ride along in the car, they pass the time pointing out signs they see and demanding that I read them. They point out all the letters they see then they will tell me which of those letters they have in their name. They also eavesdrop. If they overhear me talking to someone, they pipe in saying, "What are you guys talking about?" and no matter how hard I try to ignore them, they keep saying it until they get an answer.

They suddenly, or so it seems, know all this stuff. And they constantly talk and ask questions. I mean constantly. They are only quiet when they sleep. It is exhausting, to have to keep up with their intellectual development. Not to mention, the 10 year old. Her intellectual development is happening at break-neck speed. I predict in the next 5 years she will be more intelligent than I am. And then what am I going to do? I caught her with my HTML programming book the other day, teaching herself the programming language to build websites. What the hell is that about?

I am soon to be surrounded by a house full of people that are a million times smarter than me. Maybe they will still find a use for me, I mean someone has to put away their shoes, right?